Thursday, 29 April 2010

April's Worst Dressed

Jennifer Lopez
JLo in Europe this week. Fried hair, overweaved, drag queen make up... these are the positve comments. One hot mess after another. I think she woke up in a drag queen dream!

Catherine Zeta Jones.
Catherine Zeta Jones is lost! I don't get it, it seems that neither does she! She needs a good stylist to get it together for her.

Toni Braxton
At fortysomething with a decent figure, but still this is fabulously bad. Nothing flattering about this. This looks looks like a stripper's outfit, not something to wear out to dinner. Looking like a mid-life crisis to me!

*rolling my eyes*
Speaking of which, I have no words for Amber. She's been a little out of the limelight and needs to call attention back again. Nothing nice here. Paris Hilton, this outfit screams ho ho ho (not father Christmas either!).  Bianca Gascoigne is looking to steal Jordan's crown. Where do I begin. I won't. Enough!
Claudia Winkleman! Oh dear, the cape contraption does not look comfortable, neither do the odd boots that make her feet look like stumps. I love Donna Karan's clothes but not how she puts them together herself. Sorry Ms Karan, she should know better. I don't understand Melissa George's outfit. I am confused.
Katie, Katie, Katie! Confused and lost! I still hate the 'statement' bag. In this case it looks a plastic mess. Mischa Barton belongs here after her choices this month! And Kelly Osborne needs to rinse the granny purple before I take her style choices seriously again!  
Gwenyth Paltrow does not seem to realise that there is such a thing as too short and too tight (the white legs make me feel too cold!). Sarah Jessica Parker. Sorry, but I have to for being a fashion pendulum swinging from great to.... well, this.

Riddle me this: how does a Billionaire's daughter, Tamara Ecclestone manage to look so cheap. Please somebody? I know Konnie Huq is not that rich, but still there is no excuse for this slackness.

Lindsay Lohan is at home on this list. I am disturbed by her 15 year old sister. She looks like she has 'seen' things. The road looks rocky!

I weep for the little ones. Justin Beiber, I have not words for his pubescent stylings. I still don't get the fanatical attraction with Channing Tatum. And Zachary Quinto has to quit attempting perfection. He looks over groomed and it fights his hotness.
When a swimsuit is not 'pretty' at least it has to be functional. Beyonce's swimsuit fails her on so many levels.

You know I saved a place for Mariah and Nick on this list.

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